Mr. Killjoy

Life must have been a barrel of laughs in the Degauque household. Monique Degauque was the 'troubled teen' from Belgium who converted to Islam, and set off to Baghdad with her Moroccan husband on a suicide bombing mission in early November. Life with the in-laws wasn't easy: Monique's mother recalls that her son-in-law, Issam Gorris, made them do things his way.

"When we saw them, they imposed their rules. We were at home, but my husband had to eat in the kitchen with Issam while the women ate together in the sitting room. There was no question of putting on the TV or opening a beer."

Suddenly I see an idea for a new sitcom - a kind of 'All in the Family Jihad', or 'Bomb thy Neighbour'. Here's the pitch:

Scene: suburban living room. Slobbish Archie Bunker type sits on sofa. Young Muslim man walks in. Audience whoops.
Issam: Hey Infidel, I'm home.
(Studio audience whoops some more and applauds)
Archie: Hi, meathead, grab y'self a beer.
Issam: By the beard of the prophet, do you not know I am forbidden such things!
(Audience laughter)
Archie: Okay, keep your keffiyeh on. Let's watch some TV.
Issam: What, and witness the shameless infidel whores flaunting themselves? I've a good mind to...(reaches under his jacket...audience whoops and cheers...shouts of 'Allah Akbar'...)